I once heard the quote “stop the glorification of busy.” I feel strongly about this quote, I believe it happens, I believe it’s toxic, I believe it becomes a competition.

I hear it in the aisles of Target, I see it on social media.

When we run into an old friend, we instantly go into the insanity of our schedule, “Johnny has football and then he runs to soccer directly after, that’s just on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays, on Tuesdays he has Scouts and violin lessons, meanwhile, Sally is at tennis after bible study, she has piano and a recital on Thursday, all while I’m working to host a charity event and husband is traveling to Egypt and then to New Zealand and I’m just over here losing my mind!

But…things are good!” (we always say that at the end, don’t we? Whether we are trying to convince ourselves of this or the person at the other end of the conversation, I’m not sure.)

Then the other person responds with their crazy schedule and then we’re all just sitting around, allowing our crazy schedules to lead our lives, leaving us exhausted and empty. (Hey, I do it, too. Even when I’m trying not to do it.)

In our house, we’re busy, too. On Monday evening, we had six different dinner times, which means we all ate dinner separately. All because of a crazy schedule.

The truth is, for so many of us, these are just busy times. But they don’t have to be just busy. They can be busy and meaningful. Busy and powerful. We can have busy with really good, happy, calm moments sprinkled in.

At some point throughout the night, especially nights like these, I try to take some moments with each person in my family. Even if it’s on the way to a study group, or walking to the car after practice. Not rushed, not angry, not flustered, just sweet, calm conversation. Attempting to make our connections stronger even with a schedule that could potentially do the very opposite.

Some days, connecting isn’t so easy, we’re overwhelmed, Anna is cranky, Noah is distracted, Eli is silly, Clara is sassy and Sarah Jane is fussy and throwing food off her high chair tray. And that’s okay, too. Just don’t give up trying, nobody wants you to give up trying, even though the message from your children may feel like a totally different message. They need your connection more than anything in the world.

Our table, our home, becomes our sanctuary, even through the chaos, it’s the place where we can sit at the end of the evening, take a deep breath and pat ourselves on the back for handling the schedules and doing the best we could.

Throughout the busyness of our evening, the kids sat at the same table, eating the same familiar food. Even though we didn’t sit together, we still sat, in our comfortable, safe, reliable space, this is our home, even through the chaos, it should feel like a safe haven for every single one of us.